Monthly Archives: February 2018

Talk with Tom: Episode #30 | Creating Successful Relationships

 

On today’s episode of Talk with Tom, we continue with our February theme of “Relationships” with a discussion of Part IV (Create Successful Relationships) of Jack Canfield’s best selling book The Success Principles.

You will hear best practices for team and family communications to gain better clarity, make win/win agreements and optimize your listening skills.


Every month Tom shares topic after topic to Grow Your Life and Build Your Business. If you’re not already a subscriber, join us. Talk with Tom is 100% free, and there are special benefits available only to our subscribers, so be sure you subscribe yourself on iTunes or wherever you get your podcasts, and we look forward to seeing you right back here on the last Wednesday of every month with Talk with Tom.

Relationship Series #3: 10 Tips For Having More Meaningful Relationships

 

#GrowYourLife 

Life Area: Relational

Topic: Relationship Tips


10 Tips For Having More Meaningful Relationships

In this last of my February Relationship Series, I give you 10 tips for having meaningful relationships. The term “relationship” encompasses many forms: clients and customers, work colleagues, one’s significant love, parents, children, even acquaintances and strangers to a certain extent. All of these “relationships” can have a positive or a negative influence on our lives. The condition of our relationships, and most certainly our most significant relationships, have an impact on our successes in each of the 7 life areas.

Want to know how to achieve more meaningful relationships with those around you? Start with these 10 simple tips:

1. Take inventory of the relationships you have.

Some relationships are meant to last for a long time, others serve a short-term purpose or life lesson. Take an inventory of the relationships you have and see which ones you would like to keep and which you should let go. Letting go of unnecessary or toxic relationships make room for new ones to show up.

2. Be happy with yourself.

As I described in my blog post A Simple 3 Step Process to Self-Acceptance found [here], your most important relationship is your relationship with yourself. Be happy with yourself…always.

3. Be positive.

Here’s a quick question. Would you rather spend time with someone who is a downer or someone who is upbeat?  Barbara Frederickson, a psychologist at the University of North Carolina, backs up the obvious by writing in Psychology Today, that positive emotions help us “broaden and build” relationships.


Would you rather spend time with someone who is a downer or someone who is upbeat?


4. Don’t be someone else.

Be yourself. Be authentic. As Adrian Savage puts it in LifeHack, “If you can’t trust yourself, why should others trust you?”

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Relationship Series #2: 8 Equivalents of Functional Teams & Functional Families

 

functional families

#GrowYourLife 

Life Area: Relational

Topic: Functional Families


8 Equivalents of Functional Teams & Functional Families

Continuing my blog theme of “Relationships” for this month of Valentine’s Day, I identify today 8 habits that crossover from functional teams at work to functional families at home. It was an article in Real Simple magazine by author Patrick Lencioni (The 5 Dysfunctions of a Team) that prompts this post translating organizational dynamics to a family setting:

 

Identify your core values. Companies define their core values because they provide a great framework for making all kinds of decisions. To apply this idea to your family, think about what common traits drive each family member.

 

Establish a single top priority.  If everything is important, nothing is. Too many companies fail because they spread their time and energies too thin. Answer this question as it relates to your family: “If we accomplish one big thing as a family in the next few months, what should it be?”, and then work on it.

 


If we accomplish one big thing as a family in the next few months,

what should it be?


 

Keep your values and top priority visible.  You don’t need an engraved plaque stating your vision and mission, but write it down and stick it on the refrigerator where everyone will see it everyday.

 

Don’t make snap decisions.  Companies (and families) tend to take on commitments out of peer pressure or guilt, before they understand what’s involved. Gather information and then make a decision.

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Talk with Tom: Episode #29 | TwT MM: Your Most Important Relationship – Your Relationship with Yourself

 

TwT MM Self Acceptance

It’s February and “relationships” is my blog theme for this month of Valentine’s Day. Let’s begin our deep dive into the Relational Life Area, with your most important relationship: your relationship with yourself. Specifically, accepting yourself unconditionally.

  1. Your attitude toward yourself is determined largely by the attitudes that YOU “think” other people have toward you.
  2. Stop being troubled by things that may have happened in your past.
  3. Arrive at self-acceptance.

Every month, in just 30 minutes, Tom shares topic after topic to Grow Your Life and Build Your Business. If you’re not already a subscriber, join us. Talk with Tom is 100% free, and there are special benefits available only to our subscribers, so be sure you subscribe yourself on iTunes or wherever you get your podcasts, and we look forward to seeing you right back here on the last Wednesday of every month with Talk with Tom.

Relationship Series #1: A Simple 3 Step Process To Self-Acceptance

 

#GrowYourLife 

Life Area: Relational

Topic: Accepting Yourself

 

A Simple 3 Step Process To Self-Acceptance

It’s February and ”relationships” is my blog theme for this month of Valentine’s Day. Let’s begin our deep dive into the Relational life area, with your most important relationship: your relationship with yourself. Specifically, accepting yourself unconditionally.

The other day in a coaching session it became apparent to me that my client hadn’t yet fully accepted herself.  Now, I admit we all on-goingly struggle with this to a certain extent, but she hadn’t even begun the process and this was standing in the way of a major breakthrough for her so I walked her through the following simple 3 step process:

Step 1:               Your attitude toward yourself is determined largely by the attitudes that YOU “think” other people have toward you. When you believe that other people think highly of you, your level of self-acceptance goes up and vice versa.

Step 2:               For you to truly understand yourself, or to stop being troubled by things that may have happened in your past, you have to be able to get those things off your chest. When you can disclose what you’re truly thinking and feeling to someone else, you can become aware of those thoughts and emotions yourself. If the other person simply listens to you without commenting or criticizing, you have the opportunity to become more aware of the person you are and why you do the things you do. You begin to develop perspective, or what some call “detachment.”


When you can stand back and look at yourself honestly, and candidly admit to others that you’re not perfect, then you can start to enjoy a heightened sense of self-acceptance.


Step 3:               After doing those things, you arrive at self-acceptance. You accept yourself for who you are: the good and the bad, your strengths and your weaknesses. When you can stand back and look at yourself honestly, and candidly admit to others that you’re not perfect, then you can start to enjoy a heightened sense of self-acceptance.

YOUR ACTION STEP

A valuable exercise for developing higher levels of self-acceptance is to take an inventory of your unique talents and abilities and your past successes in both your personal and professional life. Think about how those things will serve you in the future and the possibilities that may come from them and soon you will determine that you WILL have what you want to have, do what you want to do, and be who you want to be. You can then set goals and move toward them.

Remember, there are no obstacles to what you can accomplish except the obstacles that you create in your own mind…so keep your monkey-mind in check!

 

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I am a Success Strategist and Master Coach. I provide transformational coaching and training for individuals and organizations to help you Grow Your Life and Build Your Business by getting clear and focused on what you want, why you want it, and how to create it. Learn more about me at SuccessSeriesLLC.com.

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